The Random Reports: Rixa Files
by Technician Fan
Summary: the insane daily life of Rixa the bumbling mage. follow her life inbetween the chapters of her normal missions.


**Disclaimer:** I own only the name and my self (Rixa), but my cohorts own themselves (Rethahixe and Radmoxe). But if we did Organization 13 would not have to be on vacation right now if you know what I mean! (Sorry my friends say I'm living in denial about their death. But I still say they all teleported out at the last minute, and are right now sitting on the beach in the Bahamas, sipping martinis. Without numbers 16-18! The superior forgot us (Cries)... sorry. On with the story! (We hope that any minute now they will say "Oh my Kingdom Hearts we forgot them! How could we do that!" and they will rush back for us)

**Authors note:** sorry forgot something... this is pure crack and does not tie in with the main story line. It will weave in and out of Canon-ness, but otherwise prepare fore insanity at its greatest. Also I am aware the many of the themes I will use have been used too many times, but I tell you now.... I DON'T REALLY CARE! Anyway enough of my ranting.

-Rixa

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**The Rixa Reports:**

The Stupid Files

It was just another dreary day in The World That Never Was when Rixa decided she wanted to explore the castle, it was only her third day there and she had yet to meet anyone but those she went on training missions with and the superior. Today she had decided to explore each floor of the castle each day. But as we all know, simple exploration can turn a dreary day upside down and inside out. And that my friends is how this incident began...

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Castle That Never Was  
Day 1 Basement  
Lv. 4

"Hundreds of books and nothing good to read! How lame... where's Zexion to point out a good book when you need him?" I said as I slumped against one of the many bookcases in the B4 library, sadly the books in this entire library were mostly science related. Don't these guys ever read anything good? As I scoped out the many books higher up on the shelves I began to wonder, where exactly is everybody? Normally Zexion is sitting in his chair reading something or other, Larxene is usually up on the second floor balcony area with her sadistic book collection she thinks is a secret, but every one knows its there, so everyone lets her believe it just to shut her up. Marluxia is occasionally here... unremarkably in the botany section, along with Vexen and in the chemistry section. Everyone else would probably be in one of the other floor libraries I had yet to fully explore. Funny how I know were each member's section is, yet I can't find anything for me. Heck Naminé is sometimes here on the top floor, sitting mindlessly doodling at the table in front to an angel statue. So where is every one? Even if there was a mission that requires the full organization, Naminé would still be here, and on that note I would be with everyone else! Of course there is the fact that I still don't have a clue how to fight worth crap, I can barely fight a horde of Soldier heartless before being overwhelmed. But anyway back to my problem at hand... where is everyone! It was not long till I heard a swish of a cloak and the dashing of booted feet, bobbing and weaving between the bookcases. "Okay Axel... Demyx... or whoever, this is so not cool. Soon there was silence once again, and it wasn't long till I was knock flat on my face by none other than a small shadow heartless, too small to be an ordinary one, I mean this guy was at least half the size of a normal Shadow.

"Aww you are so cute!" I squeaked, completely forgetting this little cutie was a heartless and that he had just knocked me to the ground despite his diminutive size. I patted the seemingly harmless creature on the head and stood up and turned around to continue my search for my comrades. I got about three steps away from the Shadow when I felt a tug on the back of my cloak. The Heartless was trying to lead me through the bookcases, for reasons that I couldn't possibly guess.

"Ok little fella, but then I have to go find my friends." I said while patting him on the head once more to show my understanding. As I was lead through the vast library of science books I began to notice that the shelves were becoming dustier and dustier. I guess Zexion doesn't get around to all the books in the libraries and still have time to go on missions, have a social life, and read a good book. Now I know how he does it all... he only cleans the first fifty bookshelves on each floor of each library, except for possibly the small library on the fifth upper floor. I mean I can understand his reluctance to clean EVERY bookshelf in the HUGE lower libraries, but I wonder what he does when some one needs a book thats WAY in the back of the library? It was not long till we passed the incriminating signs of Zexion's secret laziness, and that was when things started to get creepy. Spider webs and small spiders who inhabited them lurked between books and shelves and hanging from the ceiling. It was enough to make my skin crawl. God to I hate spiders, I just can't stand them! A few moments later we came to an empty area in the farthest reaches of the library, and lurking in the corner was the Biggest, ugliest, hairiest spider heartless I have ever seen in my entire life! And In my blind fear I ran only to bump into the previously unnoticed pillars of webbing cocoons. It was then that I noticed that these cocoons were where the missing members of the Organization had disappeared to! Even Zexion, who's pod I had run into! I was shocked... i looked into the pod on the left and looked into the face of Axel, the most stubborn person here. I looked further to see our very superior... Xemnas in the same state as the others! I turned to see the Spider Heartless slowly progressing towards my little friend and I. I did the first thing that came to my mind... I grabbed my little friend and ran.

I ran through the bookcases, hoping they would slow it down. But sadly it seemed very intent on completing its collection of life-like one of a kind, Organization 13 member dolls. It wasn't long till my lack of athleticism caught up with me. I soon lost my balance and collapsed in a heap on the cold stone floor of the library. I couldn't breath or move, all I could do was wait for the end to come. I had apparently been out running the Spider Heartless because it took a few moments for it to round the corner and find me lying on the floor, facing the very thing I feared most. As the Spider Heartless came closer, I closed my eyes and began to steel myself for the bitter end that was soon to come, but it didn't. Instead I opened my eyes slowly to see a giant Dark Side standing almost protectively in front of me. I was stunned, I couldn't believe the thought of one of these heartless being my savior. It grabbed the Spider Heartless and slammed it into the wall, making it fade away into nothingness. The Dark Side then turned to me and slowly began to shrink and change into something I didn't expect. It was the Tiny Shadow! I was dumbfounded, how could this little guy have so much power? While I mulled on this thought, I walked towards where my comrades where stored to thankfully see them all climbing out of the pods safely. "Oh my god you're all safe!" I said going from friend to friend, passing out hugs. They all just looked at me and said a collective "What happened?" in there own way. But it was Xemnas who stepped forward and said "by the looks of it, Rixa, you have saved us all." In a way did, but in a way I didn't. Normally I would have been an attention hound and taken all the glory, but I couldn't do it. I looked at Xemnas and shook my head. I turned around and picked up my little friend and held him out for all to see, and said triumphantly "This is your savior, I just helped." I earned more than a few snickers, and sadly it wasn't the candy, but I didn't change my story. Only one person seemed to believe me, some how Zexion seemed to know what I said was truth. I retracted my arms and stated "fine! You don't believe me? I'm keeping him; soon you'll all see! Isn't that right Franky?" And at that I turned in a huff and walked the long path upstairs to my room. I've had more than enough adventure for one day!

A lone figure sits at a desk in the very library, where not long ago a mystery had unfolded. He sat pondering the "Birthday" card he held in his hand, which was signed by all the members of the organization. How had he been the one, picked to organize the party? He... who would rather sit alone reading while everyone else partied. "You'd think it would be easy for me! I can scheme the best plans and manipulate almost anyone, but I can't for the life of me figure out the best way to though a surprise party!" he quietly ranted, as was his way... for hardly ever did he raise his voice. But it wasn't long till a mental light bulb went of in the young man's mind. He hastily scrawled down his idea and mentally read it back to himself. He smiled and murmured in the silence. "Perfect... she won't have a clue. Now... to get her a new gift." As he turned in his chair to face the shape-shift proof container whose small occupant was now in the possession of his intended owner. He just shook his head at the irony and scrawled down the word: _"Franky"_ and sat back in the chair while muttering "well at least I know what to put on the name tag."

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Not very Random I know but I wanted to start things out a little more serious that it would be in later chapters!


End file.
